Not All Men Are Pigs

January 13, 2018

Yesterday I wrote about how I was traumatised by experiences in my younger life by the men that were in my life (emotional trauma rather than sexual but damaging non the less).

 

This provoked me into thinking about that time in my life and trying to recall positive experiences with men.

 

Through learning about trauma I now know how important it is to draw on positive feelings. When we become stuck in the adrenaline response due to a shock to the nervous system (trauma) then it can become hard to genuinely feel good about the positive things in your life, past and present. That's because your brain is on survival mode and it's safer to be on high alert, looking out for danger rather than feeling good about life.

 

Back to my experiences. There was one male positive role model growing up, my uncle. He was the stereotypical fun, carefree uncle and I loved him to bits (still do). I have so many happy memories of having fun days out with him and my cousins and I'm now able to experience that love we all gave to each other fully in my body.

 

Being able to feel love and connection with other people is a basic human need (not a new age hippy idea, which can often be implied). Who were your positive role models growing up? Are you able to fully enjoy those memories or are they tainted by the 'ah buts' (a classic trauma symptom)?

 

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